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Many times, people come to my practice seeking a safe and nurturing place where they can regress. This lets them be and feel more vulnerable and childlike, they find it comforting and there can be a load of playfulness as I facilitate them to do it. It can bring a lot of emotional relief from adult life.
In my space you can feel free from responsibilities, stress and the expectations that come with adulthood.
But sometimes I notice that there are some clients who struggle when they get an adult thought during their session, or a worry crosses their mind, or just they remember responsibilities and that makes them feel like they are not regressing as they would like to. Some of them would start to believe that they are not achieving the regression they would like to, as these thoughts creep in unexpectedly and pull them out of the state where they would like to be.
They where feeling so small and cute and regressed and then... whey can't then just stay in the moment? Some feel like they are failing because their adult mind won't switch off completely.
This conflict arises because, on one hand, they seek total immersion in a childlike state, but on the other hand, their adult self naturally reasserts itself. I understand that this can be frustrating, but only if the expectation was to be in a "baby" mental space all the time. Others have the same exact adult thoughts and don't worry about them the slightest, after all we are dealing with "adult babies", so it is only normal that at times the adult mindset kiks in.
What I want to mean is that this does not happen to everybody, and also that to those who experienced it, only a part of them get frustrated about it, and the others are fine integrating aspects of themselves, adult and baby.
What I offer in those moments who those who find it hard when they get those adult thoughts, is to help them address those frustration and encourage them to accept their adult thoughts as a normal part of the process. It's okay to shif "in" and "out" of the regressed state during a session and your adult thoughts are not a failure, but a natural part of the flow of your mind.
I might use some ACT Principles to address this (ACT stands as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) if I encourage acceptance of those adult thoughts instead of suppressing them. I might be okay talking to you as adult, and normally when the person relaxes about it, they would normally sink again into the baby state. I would remind you that the goal isn’t to have a completely clear mind or stay in one state continuously. Actually this is not just patrimony of ACT, but of Mindfulness and most of the meditative practices.
It reminds me a lot to a meditative state, when someone wants to meditate and believes that it means "have your mind in blank". But the mind is rarely in blank and we will think a lot of things. Seeing the adult estate as a passing cloud will help you be with it in the moment it's there, but not with anxiety, just with curiousity!
You don’t need to fight to stay in one state. You can flow between being present as an adult and regressing. Both are valid parts of your experience. And even frustration is a part of your learning process.
In my practice, I help my ABs integrate the experience of adult thoughts with their desire for regression. They can enjoy a most fulfilling and dynamic experience that respects both their adult and childlike states.